one line for your mind one time
I used to date a ghost… yeah she was my boo.
gravy yard
Why do menus at restaurants or cafeterias at school/work try to recreate Thanksgiving meals during the week of Thanksgiving? There’s a reason people only eat “Thanksgiving Food” once a year, it’s heavy, it’s thick, and it makes me think about life’s choices. I don’t need the cafeteria at work/school to make a worse version of stuffing, potatoes, and green bean casserole. No thank you. I do want to rename Thanksgiving to “Gravy Day’ because we put gravy on everything. I like to think gravy is symbolic as it ‘covers up’ all the atrocities of America’s past and the potatoes. Thanksgiving food is food that will lead you to the graveyard.
pentagon of books
There are sensors at the exits of libraries to ensure people don’t steal books. No one is stealing something that is free. It’s impossible to steal something that is free. I’m baffled by the security they have at libraries. They should be wanting people to come in, not deterring them with sensors. Libraries don’t need sensors. Grocery stores need sensors. I’d much rather steal a pack of bacon than Charlotte’s Web. How arrogant are you as a library? You’re still competing againist the internet and we all know the internet wins everytime.
book waiting
Sometimes I go to the library to get work done rather than go to the office since it’s closer to my house. I got to the library before it opened one day last week and it had a line of people waiting to get in. Never have I ever seen a line for people to get in the library. These low life scum bags raced in there like it was there last chance at being at a library. Get a life. However, I’m glad people are utilizing the library. I saw a sign that the library is closed on Thanksgiving and the day after. Why do people get the day off after Thanksgiving? It’s the day after. If that’s the case then we should get the day before off too. The sign said The library is closed in observance of Thanksgiving and day after. No one is observing Thanksgiving the day after unless you consider a food coma ‘observing’.
toxic smiles
I’ve heard of pyschologists discuss a term as ‘Toxic Positivity” which is the idea of trying to be happy all the time. It says how people are so focused on being happy that they never are. I believe this to be true. I’m developing a new theory called Toxic Healthy Eating in where you eat so healthy that you are miserable from not eating any comfort food. We all know a dish of ice cream can cure a crummy day. We all know a beer takes the edge off. We all know a piece of candy hits the spot. But if you avoid all this crap food what do you have to look forward to? Asparagus? Banana? Water? Those don’t take the edge off. Eating that just makes me mad and jealous of all the people who are enjoying life. New theory, Eat like sh*t.
wallet
I lost my wallet in my house. I guess it’s not technically lost since it was in my house. I haven’t had it for 3 days. Luckily, I have a cash stash in my drawer next to my bed. I just told you guys where my secret hiding spot of money is. For the last 3 days I’ve been using cash to buy groceries and gas. It’s such an archaic method of payment. I don’t want cash back anytime I make a purchase at the grocery store so whenever they ask me to round up I just say yes. I don’t want change back. Keep the change ya filfthy animal.
doogie howser moment
This blog made me realize I want to be a library. Libraries have security tand people wait to get in before it opens. That must feel good to know people want to enter you. The library is also the one place I don’t need a wallet for unless my library card is in my wallet. The library is a great way to “read” off those Thanksgiving day calories. Don’t worry be happy. I should I say don’t worry eat crappy.