intro/take my garb
I love when it’s garbage day. I love watching them take all my garbage and shake it into the garbage truck. I love the sound. It’s so satisfying even though I just walked the garbage to the curb and they did the rest. It’s a great feeling to watch someone do something for you.
boris
I was doing yardwork over the week and met one of my neighbors who lives behind me. He was a young guy with a nice preppy hair cut. He was wearing short jean shorts and a tee. He was scrawny. He was essentially a dork. It looked like testosterone avoided his body at all costs. He introduced himself and said with a thick eastern European accent, “my name is Boris”. I was confused. This little pip squeak of a man was named Boris? His name did not match his body. I thought he was going to have a nerd name like Simon. If your name is Boris you need to be a 6’8 man with muscles, a mustache, and talk about drinking beer like it’s water. My neighbor Boris was talking about planting a garden.
single dad confidence
My gf left me and the kids for a night because she had to go out of town for a work training. I get nervous when I have to watch the kids alone. I’m scared something bad is going to happen. All the responsibility falls on me. Even though I was nervous, it did give me confidence to do it on my own. I was able to keep the house in order and the kids alive. I accomplished my goal. I didn’t freak out. I had no meltdowns. It also gave me the confidence to be a single dad. I could handle being a single dad after watching my kids for one night. I’m now prepared to be a single dad.
i do blow
One of the best feelings to me is blowing my nose. I love a clear nostril. It’s ironically breathtaking. I feel like I have so much freedom. I can breath so easily. It’s crazy to thing one little booger can really constrict your nasal passage. I often will blow my nose just to see if I have anything in there. It’s a great stress relief.
jumbo burrito
I go out to eat once a week so I won’t get sick of eating out. I went to a Mexican restaurant. I debated on what to get. Do I get the burrito or jumbo burrito? I ordered the jumbo burrito. It was a mistake. Usually, places embellish how big something is but not this place. It was truly a jumbo burrito. It was the size of 2 burritos. A regular burrito is already big enough but I thought it was a good idea to get a jumbo. I felt obligated to eat the whole thing and I did. I relapsed on meat. I felt ill. I had to take a cold shower to rid of the jumbo burrito. I even got a taco on the side and ate the rice/beans that came with it. I haven’t felt the same. I don’t know if I ever will.
coffee shop
I was working at a coffee shop during my lunch break. I sat outside and heard every order at the take out window. The barista announced every order over an intercom. I don’t think they should call coffee shops coffee shops anymore. The amount of custom orders is ridiculous. Frappe this, Latte that. Everyone has whip cream in their drinks. I heard one order say ” gingerbread latte with oat milk”. What the hell? When did coffee shops turn into Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? It’s a sugar hole. You can hardly even order a coffee at a coffee shop. Everything is jacked up with sugar. They should call coffee shops gut rot.
doogie howser moment
I learned that jumbo burritos are a horrible idea no matter how hungry you think you are. A even worse idea is a gingerbread latte. That actually might cause more damage than a burrito. I shouldn’t judge people by what they drink or my neighbor who looks like a Simon. I also learned I could be a single dad for one night. I’m going to go now because I need to blow my nose and feel stress relieved from watching the garbage man take my jumbo mess.