intro
You know how am I doing good in life? I saw a quarter on the ground and walked right by without picking it up.
my reaction: Years ago I would’ve picked that quarter up but now I’m financially stable. I looked George Washington right in the eye and said, “not today”. You may have never told a lie but you’re going to “lie” today as in lie right on the ground. Bye George.
new old year
Its the new year. Everyone is saying “happy new year” but I believe it’s not a new year. It’s all old. Nothing is new. Every year we say happy new year. This year isn’t new. There’s nothing new about it. It’s all old. The Earth isn’t getting any newer. Your not getting any younger. All the stuff around you is old. This is a moment where I just blab. I hope this paragraph made sense. I’m not sure if it did. Maybe it made sense to someone.
hot over
I love hot sauce. It’s one of the things that I look forward to. Hot sauce has its negative side effects. One of the cons is I get hot sauce hangovers. They are just like real hangovers from alcohol. I catch myself doing the cliche hangover routine. I wake up saying “I never want to do that again”. My stomach is in pain. My head hurts. I’m full of regret from the previous night. I’ll receive a message from my friend saying “Hey Curt, you did it again. You blacked out.” I feel remorse. I take a huge painful dump. I swear I’ll never do it again but then a day later I’m back on the sauce right where I started.
fire it up
My new favorite show to watch on TV (which is not even a show) is the “crackling fireplace” on Netflix. I’m glad it’s not a TV show. Sometimes TV is exhausting. A fireplace is all I need. There’s no arc. There’s no story. No characters. Most of all there is no talking. I don’t have to worry about understanding a plot. I don’t have to worry about being scared. It’s just flames and the sound of a fire. It’s relaxing. It’s just a fireplace. It’s the flame that keeps me going.
im in a pickle
I played pickle ball for the first time at the YMCA with a bunch of senior citizens. Pickle ball is like table tennis meets tennis. You play with with a paddle and you have to hit a whiffle ball over a net. I forgot how much I like old folks. They are good people. They make me feel young again. I just turned 40 and one lady asked if I was on school break? I have grey in my beard. I don’t look like a coed. My tip for the new year is hang out with old people if you want to feel young again. It works. I haven’t felt this alive in months. I could beat everyone up there too. I was the strongest guy there. I could’ve been a bully if I wanted. It was awesome. My ego was on fire like a flame in a crackling fireplace on Netflix.
a sucks
I’m getting old. You know how I’m getting old? I bought a pair of ASICS and thought they were cool. ASICS is the word “basic” without the b. Let me show you. BASIC. See, it’s Basic without the B. It’s worst than basic. It’s less than basic. The shoes were not even cheap. I spent $40 on the pair AND they were on sale. I could’ve bought a pair of Nikes for cheaper but went with the uncool brand instead. Somehow my ASICS were originally $80. How are you going to charge $80 for a pair of shoes that are less than basic?
doogie howser moment
I’m either getting wiser or getting older but by the choices I’m making I think I’m just becoming simple. I’m wearing ASICS thinking they’re cool and playing pickle ball because it’s easy. I watch fire places on the TV for entertainment. Some would say that this is a boring life but it’s not, I can walk past money and not pick it up. That’s baller status. I guess I’m a boring baller who enjoys doing hot sauce. I just don’t want to have a hangover. Happy New Old Year! Keep the flame!