something i do when i get mad at my gf take a dump in her toilet my reaction: I have the luxury of having my own bathroom but if my gf makes me mad (about something I shouldn’t be mad about) then it’s on. I like to drop a big fat one in her bathroom […]
something i’ve been saying a lot free the nipple my reaction: Lately, I’ve been asking my gf to free the nipple. I’ve asked her several times throughout the week to ‘free the nipple’. However, she has not freed the nipple. Her nipple is still in captivity. She needs to be free from societal norms, our
children’s game I don’t understand Hungry Hungry Hippos my reaction: You guys remember the game Hungry Hungry Hippos? I want to know how are all these hippos still hungry? You’re telling me after all these years that these hippos are still hungry? They just can’t seem to curb their appetite? They should be hangry now.
# 98 like Chet Aubuchon Read More »
overheard in a conversation I was in “Excuse me… that’s our wagon”- me to a couple of teen boys My reaction: I was playing with my son last week down by the creek. We couldn’t bring our wagon any closer because there was too much brush, so we left it on the sidewalk. A couple
overheard in a conversation I was in “oh…he ate all the bologna… not one slice…not a few…the whole package”- the janitor at work talking about the other janitor who ate her bologna my reaction: She was fuming about how her coworker ate all her bologna. I’m glad she can confide in me because it was
# 62 like Scott Pollard Read More »
overheard in a conversation I was in “you got no butt”- me to my brother for the last 20 years my reaction: I’d like to make a formal apology to my brother. There’s no reason I have to comment on his butt size. Why should I care if his butt is flat or not? His
overheard a long time ago “Hey Coach… F*ck you!”- 5th grader to me when I kicked him out of soccer practice for punching another player my reaction: I had every right to kick this kid out of practice, he punched a kid. He told me to F off right before he got in his mother’s
# 57 like Hilton Armstrong Read More »
people’s response when I told them where me and my family were going on vacation “Your going to Florida!?!?”- everyone my reaction: Yea… we booked a family trip to Florida. Sure, it was during college spring break, it’s a covid hot spot, and Miami Beach was declared a state of emergency last week but life
# 50 like Bimbo Coles Read More »
“He’s a stalker but a funny stalker”- co worker of mine describing a guy that likes her my reaction: If your going to have a stalker they might as well be funny. if I only jelked While in college my roommate used to “jelk”. Jelking is the process of elongating your penis by pulling it
#41 like Michael Olowokandi Read More »
overheard in a conversation I was in “The dentist office…which was 3 months ago”- my stepdaughter when asked when was the last time she flossed her teeth my reaction: Dentists floss your teeth for you…so technically you may have never flossed your teeth….ever. She is in 5th grade. It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood
# 6 like Avery Johnson Read More »
