something I said at a cookie decorating party i hope this doesn’t turn into a diddy party my reaction: Some people laughed but the second grade teacher near me didn’t. I don’t know why she was offended. She was well over her 40s. No one would touch her at a Diddy party. Also, I said, […]
something I changed the meaning of DTF my reaction: I’m DTF. I am. Don’t judge me. I guess all parents are DTF. If I’m not DTF then I’m a deadbeat. I don’t want to be a deadbeat. If you have kids you have to be DTF. I’m Down To Family. proud flipper I’m a proud
something I shouldn’t be ashamed of but I am being the first person at the library when it opened my reaction: I didn’t realize it when I walked in the library at 10:00 am but I was the first one to get there. I felt like a nerd with no life. The librarians probably all
# 245 “playground ceo” Read More »
something I want to buy a blowup doll my reaction: I’m not going to have s*x with it. I want a blowup doll to cuddle with. I share a king size bed with my gf so I don’t even realize she is in bed sometimes. I would even tape up all the holes in the
# 242 “blow it up” Read More »
something i told other parents while at the school playground the meaning of a whiskey pig my reaction: I told a few other dads the meaning of ‘whiskey pig’. I have a habit of bringing up topics that aren’t small talk. Small talk is boring. I had wondered if they used the term whiskey pig
# 240 “inflated pigs” Read More »
something people don’t experience nowadays getting lost my reaction: When’s the last time you’ve been lost? There is no way you can be lost anymore if you have a smartphone. I don’t have a smartphone. I got lost going to a bar that was 20 minutes away from house. There was a total of three
worst quote ever fake it til you make it my reaction: What if I never ‘make’ it? What if I faked it my whole life and never made it. I’m just going to be real. I’m going to fake faking it until I make it. all bottled up If I ever became a thief I
# 233 “strawed out” Read More »
something i wish for i wish that hot people have ugly kids my reaction: It’s not a wish I have every day. It’s an occasional wish. I sometimes wish that hot people have ugly kids. I don’t think good hot people should have ugly kids. I wish that materialistic, mean spirited, and a$$hole parents have
# 229 “james cool” Read More »
a sign that still exists at some stores no shoes. no shirt. no service. my reaction: If you see this sign at a store you know you’re in a neighborhood full of junkies. I don’t think a crackhead really cares about this sign anyways. But what if Michael Phelps just walks in from a swim
something I say when there is a disagreement we need a third party my reaction: Whenever I’m with a group of people and I don’t want to be direct I’ll say, “we should hire a third party”. We need a thrid party to settle this dispute. I can’t figure it out. I don’t like conflict.
